


How John lost his mind

by Thief_0f_heart



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Flushed Romance | Matesprits, Friends to Lovers, Horn Stimulation, I Don't Even Know, I don't really know what to tag, M/M, Randomness, davekat - Freeform, read if you dare, this is all over the place
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-07 13:43:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17961674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thief_0f_heart/pseuds/Thief_0f_heart
Summary: This... Is my greatest creation. I- I can't top this. This is the peak of my writing career.





	How John lost his mind

**Author's Note:**

> This is really just a mess, and I honestly don't know what I was thinking. Enjoy... I Guess xD

Dave sighed as the small troll yelled at him, he moved his hands up to Karkat's head and grabbed his nubby horns. "DON'T YOU F*UCKING DARE" yelled Karkat. Dave looked at him over his glasses with a smirk "too late" he said as he started rubbing Karkat's horns. The troll immediately melted in Dave's arms and started purring. Dave loved it when Karkat was like this, you see he had a small crush on him. Ok, maybe it was a huge crush, but he would never tell him. He loved everything about the troll. The fire in his eyes when he's mad, The way if He looked at him with just the right smirk he starts blushing and stutters, and the way if Dave, and only Dave, touches his horns he relaxes and purrs. Dave just wants to kiss him. Before Dave realizes what hes doing his lips are pressed into Karkats. Karkats protests and surprise turn into kisses and moans. When Dave finally stops Karkat is as red as a tomato, maybe redder. "S-STRIDER" He stutters. "W-WHAT DID YOU JUST DO?" He looks like he's going to pass out. "karkat" Dave said with a cocky smirk "I just smooched the hottest troll on the meteor. And I think I wanna do it again." And with that he pulls Karkat over to his room and to his couch right as the small troll's knees gave out and he fell right onto the couch. Dave sits down and pulls the blushing troll onto his lap. Karkat realized what was happening as Dave said, "can I kiss you?" Karkat says the first remark that comes in his head. "I-I DON'T KNOW. CAN YOU?" Dave tries to hide his smile and fails as he says. "hell, yeah I can." And pushes Karkat down as he crashes his lips into the trolls. Damn, that's gonna leave a bruise he thinks. The kiss is sloppy. Karkat doesn't know what to do because unlike Dave this is his first kiss. He doesn't know what to do with his tongue as Dave slides his into the troll's mouth. The trolls does the first thing that comes to mind. He slaps Dave across the face... HARD. "what the actual shit karkat." Karkat panics and runs out the room absolutely mortified. GOOD JOB, DUMB ASS Karkat thinks to himself as he runs to the bathroom. YOU RUINED YOUR CHANCES WITH YOUR FLUSH CRUSH. Dave gets up "wow, he was really good up in till he slapped me. Better go find him and see what that was about" he hears loud sobs coming from the bathroom. "karkat?!" he yells. The crying stops and Dave walks in to see the Troll sprawled out on the floor. Karkat quickly tries to run away but Dave is faster. Dave catches the troll and pushes him back in. "karkles what's wrong? Why did you slap me? Am I a bad kisser? Im a bad kisser aren't I?! I am. I'm so-" He gets stopped mid-sentence by a peck on the lips. "S-SHUT UP STRIDER" Karkat says blushing. ''then tell me why your crying'' "BECAUSE I SLAPPED YOU" He explains. ''why did you slap me!?!" Dave expresses. " YOU PUT YOUR TOUNGE IN MY MOUTH AND I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO KISS A HUMAN. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO KISS AT ALL. THAT WAS MY FIRST KISS AND I DIDN'T WANT TO HURT YOU. AND AND AND AND" Dave stops him with a passionate dip and kiss that makes the troll melt in his arms. When Dave is done, he has to hold Karkat up because his knees will give in. "you mean to tell me that no one has ever kissed you before!?" Dave says genuine surprise clear on his face. "Y-YEAH." Karkat says blushing "I'VE NEVER REALLY HAD A MATESPRIT BEFORE" Dave smiles at this. "I don't do quadrants, Kitkat." At this he pulls Karkat closer making the troll blush, "THEN WHAT DO YOU DO FOR ROMANCE?" Says Karkat confused. "this" He says kissing the troll once more. He pushes him against the wall as he puts his hands on his waist and up under his shirt making the troll shiver. "I love you karkles" "I-I LOVE YOU TOO DAVE." This makes Dave smile and he moves one hand up to his horn keeping the other on his waist. He rubs the small horns. Karkat lets out a small moan, quickly putting a hand over his mouth embarrassed. He can't help but melt. Dave starts licking Karkats horns seeing that this makes him aroused. Karkat puts his hand under Dave's shirt. He feels his belly button and pushes Dave to the floor, knocking the air out of him. ("pachoooooooo" it says because it is John xD) "what the hell babe" Dave says confused. Karkat blushes at being called babe but pulls of Dave's shirt. "woah calm down if you wanted my shirt off you could have just asked." Dave says making Karkat frown. "NO THAT'S NOT IT. WHY DO YOU HAVE A HOLE IN YOUR STOMACH? WERE YOU SHOT?" Karkats eyes go up to his nipples "AND WHAT IN THE EVERLOVING F*CK ARE THOSE?!" Dave just laughs. "these are nipples, they are to feed our children" Karkat gives the most disgusted look making Dave laugh even more. "and that is a belly button, wait karkat do you not have any of these?" Karkat shakes his head. Dave moves and Karkats shirt is off making them both blush. "wow" Dave says. "WHAT? MY GRUB SCARS?" "no, man your ripped. I mean I have abs and all but your full on ripped six packs and all. I guess your oversized sweater covers you. Man if this was one of Dirks animes my nose would be bleeding. Go-" "SHUT UP" Karkat says rolling his eyes. "YOU SHOULD SEE EQUIUS. HE TRAINED ME CAUSE I WAS 'TOO WEAK TO FIGHT JACK'" Dave leans in making Karkat blush. "well he did a ho- amazing job" and with that their lips were touching. "Dave, Karkat Come Here!" "SHIT ITS KANAYA!" Karkat said as he grabbed a shirt and put it on. "babe" Dave said smirking. "DAVE PUT ON YOUR SHIRT AND MEET ME OUT HERE IN ONE SECOND OR SO HELP ME!" Then he left. "that's my shirt karkat" Dave muttered. "whatever if you want everyone to know fine I'll put on your shirt." He walked out smirking. Karkat turned and his eyes shot wide open as he saw their shirts. "DAVE WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME!" He whispered, "I tried to karkat, it's too late now" Karkat turned around mortified, everyone was staring. "OH, MY D1D YOU TWO JUST H4V3 S3X?! I C4N SM3LL TH3 SW34T." Terezi said cackling. "I think they did ;:::::::)" Karkat started blushing "Oh My Gog" (That was Kanaya) Dave started smirking "Oh my god Dave your gay?!"(that was john) "Only for karkat" Dave says slapping Karkat's ass making him squeak. "S-SHUT UP WE DIDN'T HAVE 'SEX' WE JUST H-" "had a very aggressive make out session where karkat ripped off my shirt and I ripped off his." "STRIDER! BECAUSE I THOUGHT HE HAD BEEN SHOT AND IT TURNS OUT IT WAS JUST HIS HUMAN 'BELLY BUTTON' I DON'T KNOW WHY HE TOOK MINE THOUGH." "Sure 😉" "Rose stop" (That was dirk)"*wink wonk*... you to are su cute tother!" "*so *togrther" "*Together *hic*" And that is how John lost his mind.


End file.
